Nick Kirsch
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Think of Yourself
By Nick Kirsch on July 19, 2012  9:47 PM
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I was in Nagoya last week, on our last night, in the 8th floor of a commercial building at some kind of pasta restaraunt. Momo was scarving down pizza, Jerry was laying on my lap, and I was chatting with Eriko's mom about my career.I told her I had four "things" I wanted to accomplish:1) Be a father2) Hold a leadership role3) Start a company4) "Retire" a professorThrough broken Japanese, broken English, and Eriko, I explained that my milestones were at different points in life - first learn from others, than do yourself, then teach others. But constant through all of these was my responsibility to be a father - and without intending to, I conveyed my concern that I could not balance these things.She told me (via Eriko) something that has stuck with me - "think of yourself." As you consider your career, your next move, what you want in life - put your family aside for the moment. Don't let concern cloud your vision - think freely. Perhaps it wasn't so much that her mother said things to me, but that Eriko agreed and encouraged me.What will I be, when I grow up?
The clock.
By Nick Kirsch on February  8, 2012 11:14 PM
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It is a rare moment that I sit alone with my thoughts. A fire burns gently beside me, powered by invisible gas - warmth that continues indefinitely, effortlessly enabled by the push of a button. I sit in a magnificent home - one which exceeds my expectations, and feels foreign. My family rests above me in the bedroom, presumably gaining strength and enjoying their dreams. For the moment, they feel foreign - in the land of sleep, while I remain awake. My own moments are far and few between. I wake to the gentle nudge or grating shrill of an alarm, faced immediately with the pressure of the clock. On days when the office isn't demanding my attention, a child will be tugging and grasping for it. I move from one moment of responsibility to another - always on the clock.This is truly a rare gift - a fleeting sense of freedom, of control. As quickly as it emerged, it dissipates. I may control these words - but not the timeline in which they are created. The clock constantly reminds me that I'm on borrowed time; this freedom tonight is only stolen from tomorrow's responsibility. Back on the clock.
Balancing 2012
By Nick Kirsch on November 27, 2011  2:59 PM
My last resolution post was way back in January of 2010 and highlighted a few areas of focus:
Swimming
Reading (books)
Writing (on the blog)
Health
Japanese
I didn't stay focused on most of these things in 2010 or 2011; a few events pre-empted my wonderfully scripted world:
Momoko's birth on February 21st, 2010
Isilon's acquisition on December 21st, 2010
The purchase and remodel of our soon to be home (completed on January 21st, 2012?)
I did take swimming lessons, bought a kindle, read over ten books, and began a running program - so I